My Fasting is Over


I'm back in "our" bedroom & my praying and fasting are over.
Hubby and I talked openly last night..and he has 
agreed it would be best for his dad to have other care
while I heal . He has sought out some places and 
talked with his dad about it.  We all agree.  Of course
now his dad wants to move to a villa in Florida, but
he is NOT able to live alone.
I am so relieved , I feel it will be best for ALL of us
and it is just for a bit.  
My heart has been hurting ..I do love my hubby
and I told him last night, I dont' want our
marriage ruined..cuz when we are good it is 
wonderful..
He said he feels like he's failed when his wife is
so unhappy.. 
I am anxious, scared and I try to focus on EVERYTHING
but the cancer and the upcoming journey. The house is
decorated except the tree and the ribbons on the street lamps.
I addressed Christmas cards today, worked on updating
The Primitive Gathering, read and re-read my post op instructions,
made a list of things I need to get before the surgery..and now
I have to start on Christmas shopping, from my PC I hope!!!
Nicole, my oldest daughter is coming tomorrow, Tuesday, to cut my
hair, and we may go out to get some camisoles made for
women who have had breast surgery...with pockets to
carry my drains around in.. teehee..anything to make it fun.
On Thanksgiving, only my youngest daughter came over..and
we girls sat in the dining room to eat..Rich and his dad sat in the
kitchen to eat.. I made lots of food, turkey, gravy, rolls, sweet potato casserole,
deviled eggs, stuffing, pumpkin pie..I had more to make
but when I found out my two oldest wouldn't be coming, I decided we
had plenty to eat. I had hoped for a full house, but I know my kids
can only go so many places and the boys get tired too.
It was good to have Mercedes home, I miss her so much, but she's
grown and doing QUITE well on her own.

I hardly slept last night, I don't know why..but I did take a nap today..and I
plan to go to bed early tonight..I'm reading a sweet book by
Debbie Mac Comber called "Christmas Wishes"
I love her light love stories at Christmas 
thank you all for your prayers, friendship, encouragement and love
it means so much..Deena

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